Why the letter, and what’s the impact?

I gave Mistress the letter to read in bed on Saturday morning, while I was downstairs making Her tea.

I had taken a while to write it on the Friday afternoon, and I read and re-read it a few times making a few changes before I felt it was presentable. Mostly the changes were to make sure that I was not grovelling or begging for ‘lashings’ of domination.

I was never truly happy that I achieved that – but when I took those sections out, and was just left with the ‘Your Way’ and ‘Not the man You married’ sections, I did not feel that it communicated my true thoughts well enough, so I sent it as you now read it below.

I wanted to achieve three things:-

· Make sure She did not feel that I thought She should be caning me – because I want this only to be Her decision and not something I’ve asked for.

· Make sure She new that I would gladly submit to Her if She did choose to cane me.

· Pledge my commitment to living Her way.

Presenting the letter

I wanted to make sure the letter had no ‘sting’ in it, so handed it to Her and said “I am confused. And I have some things I’d like to to say to you, so I have written them in a letter. I am not sure if it’s the right thing to do, but here you are.”

Then I went down to make the tea.

20 minutes later I was back with the tea, and as She sipped it She thanked me for the letter, and said that She had read it twice, and that it did provide clarity on a few things She had been thinking, and that it was good. I thanked Her.

I lay there worrying about the rather submissive work I had become, and eventually muscled up the guts to ask Her is She was happy to be with the submissive character I had become, and She said yes. Well, I can’t argue with that! In truth, I was quite pleased with it. That was all that came of it Saturday.

Her first overt act

Sunday afternoon the kids were amusing themselves and I was cutting wood outside when Mistress came out and told me to come up and eat Her. I gladly did, duly delivering a shuddering orgasm to Her gorgeous frame as I cupped Her lovely tits and licked Her pussy.

Once She had cum I probed deep and gentle with my tongue, to maintain the sensation while steering clear of Her now sensitive clitoris. Soon She told me to go back to my wood, and I stood by the bed.

Her first man

As I got dressed I explained to Her what I had been thinking about while I ate Her.

A couple of days ago we had been chatting with Her sister who is visiting, about her kids loosing their virginity. This is a topic I never contribute much to, and have never really opened up to Mistress about my own verginity. But following on from the letter I felt a connection which I explained to Her as I stood by Her bed.

As I ate Her pussy, I thought of all the lucky guys She had given access to that lovely space since She first chose to do so – lucky, virile young men, with hard cocks that She had chosen to allow to fuck Her. None of whom will have eaten Her pussy as much as I now did. All of whom will have taken their way with Her by thrusting into that love passage that I now licked and tongued.
I thought of Her as the Goddess that granted them that pleasure, and they the jocks fortunate enough to be granted it.

I on the other hand lost my virginity at the age of 13 to a two-bit hooker. Right through until age 20 or so at university I only ever had sex with hookers (along with copious amounts of wanking). Never in my teens or at all in my life has any lovely virgin allowed me her cherry.

I explained to Mistress how inferior this made me feel – having had sex with hookers, never blessed with access to a lovely teen pussy such as the one She shared with men She chose to share Her with. How inferior this makes me feel. And how this is why I love to hear and marvel and the activities She got up to with the guys She chose to share Her teen body with.

I humbly explained to Her that this was one of the reasons I felt inferior to Her. She accepted my explanation quite gladly.

Before going back downstairs I asked if She would like me to lick Her arse before I went down, and She allowed me this pleasure, spreading Her behind for me to access. I licked and tongued Her before returning to my wood cutting.

Good thing to have written it down

Last night before we slept I said to Mistress that I was still worried to have dumped confirmation of my submission on Her, and asked again how She felt about it.

She said She was fine with it, and was happy that I had chosen to write my feelings down for Her to read.

This morning She kindly allowed me to lick Her arse before getting up and going to the gym.
I do keep reminding myself that the whole point of the letter was not to attract increased domination, but rather to confirm my eagerness to live Her way.