Turn on

We went to bed at around midnight last night. As I expected, Mistress had me go down on Her and as always I did so with pleasure, determined to make the experience as good as possible for Her.

I seemed to do a good job – in fact She even responded with more fervour than usual, and then half way through She spoke. She said that I have not been submissive enough, and when She next canes me, to give me the strokes I am due, I should expect no mercy because they will be extremely hard. She emphasised how hard they would be, repeating Herself in a number of ways so there could be no misunderstanding, and clearly getting turned on at the thought of how hard She would punish me.

This is the first time that Mistress has definitely shown that She is directly turned on at the thought of inflicting pain on me. She has spoken about punishing me before, and even explicitly confirmed that She finds it pleasant to do so, but last night She was actually getting off on the thought of it, and I love that.
If Mistress can draw real pleasure from punishing me and inflicting pain when She feels I am due it, then this will surely encourage Her to be a harsher Mistress, keep me on a tighter leash, and thus enhance our FemDom relationship even more. I am excited at the thought of this. My cock is hard and my pulse racing. (As required, I have texted Mistress to inform Her of this excitement).

I puzzled over why Mistress is going to cane me harder when giving me the strokes I am due, because I have not been submissive enough. I wonder to myself either:-

• Why does She not inform me when I am not submissive enough, and tell me then what my punishment will be. For example, if I do not rise to offer to do a task fast enough, and She ends up doing it, She could simply say to me that I should have done that task, and so will be punished for not having done so. Next time, I’m going to make damn sure I jump up to do the task.

• Or, She could say to me ‘You have not been submissive enough and so I am going to punish you with 5 strokes. And if you do not improve, and are not more submissive from now on, then I will give you a further ten strokes as well.’ That would focus the mind, wouldn’t it. That would make me rush to serve Her to avoid further pain.

But these actions represent the way I would handle things if I was Her. And I am not. She is the one who decides how it works, and I am the one who must live with Her decision.

I sought clarity on this point this morning, asking Mistress if there was anything that I could and should do to avoid future punishment for ‘not being submissive enough’ and She said that there is: I can serve Her better. I do not step up t the mark to serve Her enough, and should do so more. I thanked Her for this guidance, and I shall exert effort to ensure that I am more submissive and avoid further punishment.

After She came to glorious orgasm last night I offered to put it in Her – She sometimes likes to receive cock after She has cum, but She said no – I will not be allowed to put it in Her again until I have received the punishment due to me and improved my behaviour.

The in-laws are with us until Monday next week – another 6 days including today before I am allowed to put it in, assuming that She gives me my stokes at the very first available opportunity, which is not too likely.

Mistress will be dropping Her parents off at the airport early Monday morning, while I take the kids to school. So She will be back Monday lunch time and we will have the house to ourselves for the first time in 3 weeks – She may well choose to punish me then. I look forward to the experience with fear in my heart – I am due 16 strokes before any more She may add, and if She means to hurt me then I will really be for it.

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Mistress changed the password to Her Mistress.Wife 360 account yesterday so I no longer know it and am not able to access any messages sent to Her there. I have yet to show Her how it all works, but at least the facility is there and I can’t control it. I’m hoping this will be an opportunity for other dommes out there to share with Her with a view to make me a better slave to Her needs.