Talking

After our brief IM chat yesterday I had hoped that Mistress might elaborate on Her thinking during the evening, but She did not bring it up, and so neither did I (I don’t want to encourage Her to cane me). We did actually go out last night, so there wasn’t much time to talk.

My cock actually gets hard at the thought of what She said. The thought that She really will, literally, whip me into shape – mould me into Her desire. God that would be so disgustingly selfish of Her. I love it. And it is so right. It is so what I want.

My cock is getting hard now just thinking about it. The thought that next time we have weekend guests or plans I will literally be running around full of fear, making sure the laundry is done properly and put away immediately, or I will be caned severely for it is soooo horny.

I am determined that I will not encourage Mistress to cane me at all. But I must report my hard ons to Her, and so have reported to Her that this memory has made me hard. Oh my goodness. The thought that She has decided to be stricter Herself, and will actually carry it through fills me with fear, excitement and dread – but makes my cock hard! I must be mad!

Needless to say I did all the laundry very efficiently yesterday, and put it all away before Mistress got home. She must have noticed.

What's that about?

Mistress Wife says:
hello u slave boy
Mistress Wife says:
wanted to quickly say that I am sorry I've been grouchy lately and instead of being grouchy with you when things are not right. I'll just have to train you better
Mistress Wife says:
I'll crack my whip and be a tougher mistress
Sub Hubby says:
Hmmm
Mistress Wife says:
what do you mean hmmmmm?
Sub Hubby says:
Well, I would say Thank You Mistress, but why say that to someone who is promising to thrash you?
Mistress Wife says:
thank me as it will make you a better slave so less thrashing in future
Mistress Wife says:
gotta run anyway, so talk later xx
Sub Hubby says:
Yes Mistress. Enjoy. Bye. xx

Queening it

Mistress had a pedicure yesterday, so did not get home in time to deal with me. So my arse stays soft another day – but I don’t like this waiting. I’d prefer to get it over and done with.

I think She is revelling in the power. Last night She was sat on the chaise lounge having just eaten and as I cleared away Her plate She told me to pass Her the magazines under the coffee table so She could browse them while I made Her tea and tidied up. Needless to say I did just that. Isn’t She the lucky one!

This morning Mistress did not let me lick Her arse, so our day started without the usual balance that reassures me. Maybe She will let me eat Her tonight.

The fear is here

On Thursday morning as we lay in bed Mistress drew my hard cock forward into Her! I was shocked! Delighted! I did my best to do as She said and not cum, freezing as I approached the edge, but I think I dribbled a few times. She then told me to bang hard into Her until I came, but by then my cock was too mixed up, and I was able to bang, but not to cum. How frustrating! A month since my last orgasm.

This weekend we had a house guest, which interfered with my usual laundry and dishes cycle. Mistress was furious and has sentenced me to 25 strokes for not doing the laundry properly, and 25 for not doing the dishes. We spoke about it this morning again and She is genuinely cross. The fear I wanted is here – I am terrified She is going to literally bust my ass! The fear is here and I don’t like it.

She had me eat Her to orgasm last night. This morning I offered to eat Her before I got out of bed. Often She does not allow me if She has cum the night before but this morning She did allow me to lick her tender, smooth arse. I did so as well as I could, hoping to attract some smidgen of mercy.

Mistress will be back from the gym soon. I will be surprised to sleep without a bleeding arse today.

Who are my blogger readers

Dear Reader - Yes! You!

I am fascinated about who you are. Who reads these ramblings?

Please leave a comment, anything, so I can get a handle on it.

Thank you.

sub hubby

On the rack

Thursday night Mistress had had me stimulate Her with Her rabbit. She wrenched hard on both my nipples throughout the process, causing me real pain that She seamed to enjoy. Occasionally She slapped my face too, though not so hard as to hurt.

Mistress has never caused me pain so apparently for Her own pleasure before, and I was very pleased at this development. Three days later my nipples are still painful.

After a while She took the rabbit Herself and had me go down and like Her arse while She brought Herself off with the rabbit. It was a very dominant session.

Friday morning Mistress then punished me for not having offered to make Her tea.

She told me to go up and prepare myself, and told me to make sure I brought the big cane.

After Thursday’s bedroom violence I was a little worried, but to my surprise She gave me ten for not offering to make Her tea, and only 5 for disputing my entitlement to punishment. So I feel I got away lightly.

Friday morning Mistress had to run down to the utility room to get some clothes from the drying line – I forget exactly what – but I was fully expecting another 20 for causing Her to interact with laundry, so my overwhelming feeling at 15 was that I was getting away lightly.
That said, Mistress hit me harder than ever before, and my arse still sparkles today.

Friday night we had a bit of a blowout and I got very cross with and raised my voice to Mistress. As we went to bed She was fuming, and said She would be giving me ten strokes for that. She has never before sentenced me while angry, and I see this as a positive development.

She asked if I thought I deserved to be punished for my outburst, and I responded that I felt I should be punished if She thought I should be punished – I decided to follow jackie’s advice and not invite punishment on myself, but wait to see what happens.

In truth though my outburst was appalling and I do actually deserve a thorough thrashing for it. If I was to be honest with Mistress I would say that I deserve to be tied down and given some warm up strokes first – just to let Her work out how hard it is possible to hit my arse when trying to cause maximum pain.

Having established how hard She can do it, Mistress should then cane me at least as hard as that for as long as and until She absolutely believes that I have learned my lesson and will be more submissive in future.

I am struggling not to have this conversation with Her, but I do think She should decide how to discipline me and not have me tell Her what I think…

Offer! Offer! Offer!

As is well chronicled here (some would say obsessively!) every morning I offer to eat Mistress’ pussy or arse before getting out of bed to make Her tea. And every morning She chooses one or the other for me to eat – more often than not She chooses Her arse, but this morning She chose Her pussy. When She has had Her pleasure She orders me out of bed.

Mistress has never once ordered me down on Her in the morning – I have always offered – and She has only once ever said no.

Sometimes I debate whether to offer or not, but since She always accepts and enjoys it, and canes me less the more I eat Her, I don’t generally mess about – I offer every day.

Last night after support I learned a lesson about offering. Once Mistress and I were done with our food we sat back in the sitting room and chatted away about this and that. From time to time I nearly offered to make Her Her usual cups of peppermint tea and hot water, but the conversation was always racing, and I never actually got round to it.

Eventually, when the conversation paused, Mistress picked up the remote and fired up the telly. As She did, She said that She will cane me ten strokes for not offering to make Her tea.

I argued against this – She was driving the conversation; She had turned on the telly. If She wanted tea at any time, all She had to do was ask and I would jump, so why punish me for it?
Mistress condescended and agreed not to punish me, and I ran off to make Her tea.

By morning I could see the stupidity of my argument. If She felt punishment was due for not offering then of course that punishment was due.

So as we lay in bed, before I went down on Mistress, I offered up this view – with apologies, I was wrong and of course She was right and should indeed punish me.

Mistress had obviously had the same thought. She immediately agreed, and added that arguing otherwise was itself a punishable offence for which She would also cane me. I thanked Her for this wisdom, and apologised for my madness.

In choosing to ‘only’ give me ten, Mistress is recognising that She is going to use the ‘big daddy’ cane. If She were using the small one She’d have given me 20 or 30, so this is going to be bad for me – I’m sure She will give me at least another 10 if not 20 for disputing the punishment, so in all I’ll get 20 – 30 punishment strength strokes with the big daddy. My cock is both hard and soft with fear at the thought.

But the moral of the story is clear – I should have offered to get the tea before She asked. Of course I should – what do you think I’ll do today? I’ll offer of course. And that is the whole point.

And it was right to offer up to Her that She was right all along. I deserve to suffer for my stupidity, without which I will never learn.

Mistress wasted no time, stopping by today on Her way through to administer the punishment. But I was on a lengthy work call, and so She left without giving it, but it will obviously come soon.

I am lucky – my arse would be on fire now if I had not been on the ‘phone, but at least the waiting would be over. I don’t like the waiting.

Waiting

Luckily for me Mistress did not choose to instil fear in me yesterday, but we just relaxed and had a good time together.

I have observed before that this illustrates so well how She is a better person than me. Even with the opportunity of slavery and submission She still chooses to let me have fun rather then simply increasing my submission and service to Her, which is what I’d be tempted to do in Her place.

She has still never suggested to me what I should do to improve the quality of Her life (apart from make more money!) even after me asking three or four times. I guess She figures I have enough going on in my life without needing to be burdened by Her likes and dislikes. This is so generous of Her. Not many people would make that choice.

This morning I enjoyed my naked cuddle before we got up. I resolved not to offer to eat Her unless She asked, but as usual relented and offered. If I don’t offer, then I’m not putting Her first. She accepted, and I sucked and licked Her arse before getting out of bed.

Watching Her dress in the morning is such a pleasure – what a body. Hmmmm hmmmm!
It is nearly a month since I last came – inside Mistress without permission. We spoke about it this morning, and I observed to Mistress that if I had not cum in Her, it would have been 2 months! As I said, I used to cum every day!

She asked what I thought about that, and I replied that if it made Her at all happy then it was good for me, and that I did feel that not being allowed to cum made me a better submissive. She agreed that I am more submissive, and so should not, generally, be allowed to cum.

I wonder how long She will leave it. Will She allow me to cum more than 6 times a year? Less than 6 times? Maybe once or twice a year? I am grateful that She makes me even miss my orgasms, and in many ways, the longer I abstain at Her choice, the happier I am.

Fear

Mistress has just come home from Her pedicure. She is sat watching telly while Her nails dry.
I helped unpack Her Gym bag, took it up to our dressing room, put the dirty gym clothes in the laundry, made Her a cup of green tea and a yoghurt before excusing myself to come back to work.

She was being very dominant while telling me what to do – equally, I was being very submissive. I already fear Her, there is no point in not pretending I don’t and so attracting some canes.

I’m sure She has thought about whether or not to cane me this afternoon. I am equally sure that if She does then it will be designed to cause the fear we have talked about, and will probably be the hardest caning I have ever had. Oh my goodness. What have I wrought?

My 19th hole

Saturday morning Mistress kindly allowed me to go and play golf with my usual buddies. I tired after 9 holes (which has never happened to me before!) and decided to come home early.

I walked in the house to find all my girls going about their thing and gladly joined them.

The first thing I noticed on walking it was the huge pile of washing up on the sideboard. The dishwasher was on – Mistress must have put it on after I left for golf – I had loaded everything apart from Her team cup into it before I went.

Mistress had cooked and served lunch for all of them, and left me to do the washing up. In addition, the washing machine had run the was I fired off before I left, and last nights washing that I had hung out was dry. So I had to put away the dry clothes, hang out the wet ones, empty the dish washer and hand wash and put away all the other dishes.

Over the week I had been putting in a lot of work hours so also had not had time to do the hand wash garments which had build up, including a number of Mistresses lacy bras. So when I was done with the other stuff I did the hand wash too.

I happily got stuck in all these chores, quite glad I had left the golf course early, otherwise it would have been a struggle to find the time.

-0-

That night when we went to bed my cock was hard and Mistress asked me what I was thinking about.

I explained to Her that the longer I went without an orgasm the hornier I got, and the more submissive towards Her, and the more I wanted Her to dominate and hurt me.

I said that I was having two particular fantasies – one was that She started to punish me more – for any and all misdemeanours, even the most trivial, and that She punished me harder – more strokes of the cane and harder strokes of the cane. I explained to Her that the longer I went without orgasm, the more I wanted to fear Her, and that ideally the first emotion to cross my mind when I think of Her should be fear – not love or desire, but fear that She would choose to punish me.

Mistress was turned on by my confession, and had me finger Her pussy while I talked, writhing and squirming under my touch.

It is so true that over the past few days and weeks I have become obsessed with this fantasy of a more strict Mistress. I have read on a number of blogs about this trait that I share with so many other submissive men. Why do we always want more domination, when the Ladies do not want to be more dominant? I don’t know. But I had resolved not to burden Mistress with my fantasies of ‘more’, but then She did ask, so I told Her…

I asked Her if the idea turned Her on, and She said it did, and that it was right and good that I should I fear Her. I wonder though whether She will try to institute that fear in me. I hope not for my own sake!

The other fantasy to which I confessed is a horrible one. At present when Mistress canes me She ties me to the bed. I buckle ropes to my wrists and ankles, and Mistress slips them over our 4 poster bed (pictures at the bottom of the page). So once Mistress starts caning me, I can’t get up , turn round, cover myself or do anything other than squirm and cry until She releases me. At least this way I do not have to voluntarily lie there, which definitely makes it easier for me to take my punishment.

So I explained to Her that my other fantasy was that She started to train me to take my strokes without being tied down, and to do this She gave me one very hard stroke every day on my naked arse, kneeling unrestrained in front of Her. In my fantasy She continued to do this until I got used to it, and then graduated to two strokes a day and so on, until I finally got used to it and was able to kneel and take all my punishment without needing to be tied.

Mistress enjoyed listening to my fantasy, and said it was good for Her to know what I was thinking. She had me go down to eat Her, and even chose to take my cock into Her, although I was not allowed to cum – under threat of 30 strokes of the cane if I made the mistake of cumming in Her as I did in Atlanta 2o days ago – the last time I was allowed to penetrate Her and the last time I came.

So I did not cum, although my cock was so close to the edge. Mistress used my cock a few times this way, and then had me go down and lick Her arse while She wanked Herself to orgasm.
This morning when Mistress told me to get out of bed I did not immediately jump out, but She did not sentence me to any punishment – rather She warned me that She would give me 30 strokes if I did not get out, at which point I promptly did!

Girl's night out

Last night Mistress went out with a number of other girls. At about midnight She texted me to say that She was moving to a late pub with Her good buddy Amanda, and I replied that She should have fun, and if the guy in the corner hit on Her, to feel free to fuck him. At that stage I was exhausted and went up to bed.

Amanda used to feature quite a bit in our lives, as Mistresses close friend. There are a number of entries in this blog tagged with her name. Amanda is a bit of a naughty girl, and her and Mistress have enjoyed a number of wild nights out. Old and loyal readers (I hope there are some of you!) may recall that Mistress met the sportsman, Her last cuck fuck, when out one night with Amanda.

At about 1am Mistress texted me to say there were moving to Amanda’s flat, with some guy in tow that had hit on Her, but was not paying more attention to Amanda.

Cock hard, I went to sleep.

At 4am I was woken by sounds of Mistress moving about. I noticed the time and thought to myself ‘what has She been up to? She must have been fucking that guy at Amanda’s’. I immediately wondered whether there would be any sperm in Her, and whether or not I would soon be licking and sucking it out. My cock got hard and soft at the thought.

I woke up to talk to Mistress, but She said that they had thrown the guy out hours ago, and She had just been having a good time dancing and chatting with Amanda.

I didn’t know whether to believe Her or not. She could have been out fucking – there was no way I was going to know – all I could do was listen to what She says….

I did get to eat Her to orgasm before She went to sleep. There was defiantly no sperm in Her pussy. Neither was it wet like it gets if she has been playing with another girl. So I figure She was right – She was just having fun with Amanda.

I am so lucky that She lives a life where She can go out and fuck others if She wants to.
Mistress says Amanda had a bit more of her old sparkle in her, and is looking forward to going out with her again. This is good news for me, because She met Her last cuck fuck through Amanda, and so I can live in hope.

Horny

Having cum on Thursday morning before we got out of bed, Mistress was fealign horny again by the time we went to bed. I did think She might ride my cock, either to orgasm or not, because She mentioned in the day that She might use it soon, but She did not.

Rather, when we went to bed She sent me down to eat Her pussy and I brought Her to orgasm for the second time that day. It took ages, but I stayed down there and did my best, licking all Her juices clean afterwards.

So this morning when I offered to eat Her again She declined and we cuddled instead, my cock pressing hard against Her. But then She relented and allowed me to lick Her arse clean before getting out of bed – which I was keen to do so as not to get any canes today.

I luxuriated with Her arse for a while which She clearly enjoyed, and then went to make the tea.
Mistress stopped by on Her way to work, but did not cane me. Kissing arse helps!

She is looking hot today in tight jeans and a lovely skin tight top. I’d have attached a picture, but these arse holes at Yahoo have broken Yahoo photo’s so it doesn’t work any more, moved me over to flickr, and that doesn’t work either! They are useless!

Shall I shan't I?

I lay in bed this morning, my hard cock pressed against Mistress’ thigh, wondering whether or not to offer to eat Her pussy or arse before getting out of bed.

‘After all’, I figured, ‘She knows I’m here, and if She wants me to eat Her She can tell me to, so I won’t bother to offer.’

But then I also got to thinking, whenever I do offer, Mistress always says yes, so She obviously enjoys it or She’d say no, and tomorrow is Friday – there is a good risk She will want to cane me if I am not being submissive enough. Experience has shown me that I definitely get caned less the more arse I eat.

So I offered. She said yes. I ate arse. She came.

If I’m lucky I might avoid the cane tomorrow morning (which I shall offer again). Although I am happy to receive Her pain if it induces me to better submission and service to Her.

She chose to do it

Mistress came home and rushed through Her jobs in the mid afternoon. But She found time to stop long enough to cane me. I suggested that if She was busy, She could lecture me instead as there was no need to cane me, but She chose to do so.

She said I could have 15 today to remmind me who is in charge, or 20 on another day. I chose 15 today - she would have given me all 20, and probably harder, on another day so why go for that option?

They were fairly hard. But I am now errect pleased to have reason to serve Her better.

Feeling Dominant

A little more light has been shed on why Mistress left me to do all the work last night.

As we got into bed to go to sleep, She advised me that She was thinking of coming home to cane me some time the next day.

I asked why, and She responded ‘Because I can’. So it appears She is, quite simply, feeling dominant.

I submitted to Her that if that was what She wanted to do, then She must feel free to do it.

Careful what you wish for

After a busy weekend and a day out visiting friends we got home this evening and I had to pop out to buy some milk.

When I got back I was shocked to see all the dirty washing up still sat next to the sink waiting for me, the dinner waiting on the sideboard ready for me to prepare and cook, and Mistress in the lounge watching telly!

So I got to work. At last I am done. My weekend was a little longer than Hers!

It is already about 15 days since I last came, and Mistress is making no moves to do anything about it. Not so long ago She would never have let me go 15 days without an orgasm...