I can see that my jealousy causes issues for Mistress. She does not want to hurt me. And more often than not I encourage Her relationship – so how come sometimes I get jealous? How should She deal with it?
She wants to continue Her relationship – She loves it. She loves him, the dirty sex, cuckolding me, all aspects of it. Should She continue it, or should She end it?
I want Her to end it, and tell me I am all the man She wants and needs – even though I know that’s not true! How stupid is that?
I want Her to sit me down (well, tie me down, actually) and explain to me that I am just a cuckold wimp who is not able to satisfy Her sexually, and that’s why She needs a real man, with whom to enjoy alpha male sex. I want Her to tell me that the very idea that I could satisfy Her sexually is laughable.
I want Her to make me say: “I am a cuckold wimp who cannot satisfy You sexually, and You deserve a real man to take care of Your sexual needs.”
I want to genuinely support Her pursuit of Her alpha male, and genuinely accept my submissive role. So why is that so hard? And how on earth can She reconcile the two?
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4 comments:
In my opinion, being submissive does not necessarily imply feeling like dirt, which you seem to do. You seem to suffer from a severe lack of self-confidence.
You write:
I want Her to make me say: “I am a cuckold wimp who cannot satisfy You sexually, and You deserve a real man to take care of Your sexual needs.”
And you really seem to feel that way.
Could you explain to me, why? In what respects are you not able to satisfy your lady sexually. What does she want and need that you are not able to give?
You don't seem to be impotent or clumsy with your tongue. So, what is it? (Sorry for not reading all your older posts - you probably mentioned it somwhere.)
You seem to suffer. You don't seem to enjoy the cukolding, but rather to consider it a sort of punishment you think you deserve.
The other day, you wrote a comment to one of my posts, speaking of green patches in a brown field. - Sorry to say that, but from your last postings, I can only see the brown field. I hope there are many green patches, that you just forgot to show us.
Hi Tamara.
In what way am I not able to satisfy Her sexually?
Years ago I used to draw Her head down on to my cock, to give me oral. I used to fuck Her in the arse when I wanted, and I used to fuck Her every which way in bed (and every other room in the house).
Now I no longer do those things - I feel to submissive (inferior?) to do them - I prefer to follow only, and to let Her lead - and She chooses not to lead me to those places.
Thats it. In a nutshell.
There is much green - the field is a green one - green and lush! - ocassionally it has brown patches.
I can see your frustrations, but you are a submissive now and sub to your Mistress. If You are causing Her worries then you need to be corrected. It's obvious She wants you as Her childrens father and as Her sub sissy husband. You must tell Her that you are sorry for being jealous and you want to serve Her and Her bf in any way that pleases Her.
jackie
Thanks jackie.
Thinking about it overnight I reached the same conclusion as you!
Mistress wants to punish me for my behaviour, and I do deserve to be punished for it.
I will apologise to Her when She gets back home at mid day today, and ask Her to please carry out any punishment She thinks is merrited.
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