Holding Hands

As we went up to bed last night Mistress sent Dave a good night text. We discussed what She should say.

“I am off to bed, dreaming about your hard cock.”

Was this too intimate, when he knew that She was actually going to bed with me? Should She add a kiss? (They don’t usually exchange kisses in their messages).

She felt a kiss was too intimate. I said that if She wanted to establish an intimate relationship with him, then it would need to involve kisses. She agreed. He got a message with a kiss.

As we got ready for bed the debate continued and we talked about Mistress’ last date. (Actually, we talk about Dave pretty much all the time).

Following on from a reader’s comment in this blog, I had asked Mistress if She and Dave kissed on their date, and She said yes. On arrival, the first thing he did was give Her a big kiss – upon discussion it turns out they actually exchanged a big kiss…

We discussed the intimacy of the kiss, and kissing generally. Is it intimate? Is it more intimate than fucking? Is it the most intimate thing you can do? Are their kisses ‘intimate’?

We identified a more intimate act: holding hands.

She told me that as the two of them left the pub to go for a walk, Her knickers removed so that he could have ready access to Her pussy as they strolled, She put Her arm round him. He held Her hand and then moved it to his side, holding Her hand as they walked.

Immediately they felt too intimate, and both released their grip. They were not comfortable with it – they don’t have that degree of intimacy.

I can relate to this – I can only walk holding Mistress’ hand if we are happy with each other. If we have argued or are not happy, then I find the act of holding hands hypocritical and uncomfortable.

I asked Mistress if She wanted to get Her relationship with Dave to the stage where they did hold hands comfortably, and She said that yes, She did. In due course, when they were comfortable, She’d like to have an intimate boyfriend/girlfriend relationship with him in which they were both happy to hold hands.

I was lying in bed naked as She said this, and my cock got rock hard when I heard it. She saw this, and came to bed to play with it. As She got into bed She lead my cock to Her pussy. No real foreplay at all.

We discussed this too, and I observed that She did not invite me to play with Her pussy as She did with Dave, but just used my cock to fuck Her pussy. She agreed. Dave was for good, sexy times, my cock was just for fucking. ‘What’s wrong with that?’ She asked.

As She drew my cock into Her I told Her I found the idea of the two of them so intimate that in three years time they were still fucking, and were holding hands such a turn on. She moaned as we fucked, clearly turned on by this idea too.

“Imagine if the two of you were so close that you could say to him ‘Richard knows,’ ‘I got tired of running around behind his back, and so I told him about us. I told him I have a relationship with you, I fuck you, and he’s got to deal with it.’.” (Interesting punctuation there!)

She moaned and orgasmed at the idea. She said She too would love that. We slept.

I would love it if She told him and he accepted it. I would love to be submissive to both of them rather than just Her, even if the sole extent of his domination were to ignore me – which is not likely.

Going to plan…

When Mistress got it from Her date with Dave yesterday I asked if he’d got his wicked way, and got his hands inside Her wet knickers.

“What knickers?’ She replied pulling up Her short white skirt to show her naked pussy, ‘He made me take them off!” She smiled at me.

The two had been to the pub for a drink and some groping. Clearly they had a good time.

She said that they sat next to each other while he told Her how he was going to fuck Her, and Her pussy got wet. When he touched it through Her panties he could not believe how wet She was, and he asked Her to go and remove Her panties before they went outside to find a quiet spot for something more intense.

After dinner She told me to bring Her wet panties from Her handbag, kneel before Her in the sitting room and wank.

As I pulled Her pants out of Her bag I could not believe how wet they were. I’ve never seen anything like it!

As I knelt before Her She told me to pull my dick out and wank it while I licked Her pants, and thought about how another man had made Her that wet.

I took out my throbbing cock and sucked the gusset of Her pants into my mouth. As I wanked She asked me what I was thinking, and I replied that I was thinking how good a time She must have had to get so wet, and that I never made Her that wet, and how lucky She was now to have another man to do that to Her.

When I had sucked Her panties dry She told me to rub them on my cock until I came and I did, spurting all over the sitting room floor before wiping it up.

These are the pants She was wearing.

Palma

I am away at the moment - in Palma, working witha friend and business partner (and having fun!)

Dave came round the house yesterday, because I am away, and fucked Mistress. They've finally done it! She sounds very pleased. I'll update you when I get back and have the time. Imagine!

Date Night

Well, they are away on their date night – and what a strange set of plans its been.

Originally he was supposed to book a room in the hotel that they last drank in – and they were going to fuck. But then he pulled away from that, and talked in vague terms of going some other place. Nothing firm ever came of it (no pun intended) and today they decided they would go back to the hotel bar – though they have not booked a room.

Mistress is disappointed – She said She hopes to have shagged him before She gets back tonight, but obviously She’s not going to push it too far with him – She’s going to let him lead, but offer him every encouragement.

Apparently he made some comment at their last lunch date that he ‘loves the chase’. We speculate that he’s old enough to have worked out that a good chase is more fun than a fuck, but who knows. When he gets a look at Her in the outfit She left in, and gets a few glasses of wine down his neck, it’ll be interesting to see where they end up – but on a lovely sunny day like today, the hotel they are going to is going to be fully booked by now… so we shall see.

They left by train at 3:30. She’ll not be back until midnight +/- 3 hours – so about 6 intimate hours with him – smiling, drinking, chatting, touching and perhaps fucking.

Strokes

After Mistress got ready to leave this afternoon, She told me to present myself naked for disciplinary strokes. She gave me 16 strokes of the cane, which She said would be repeated twice as hard if She came back and I exhibited any signs of jealousy – I am to await Her return and greet Her happily when She gets back.

I thanked Her for the strokes and Her kind advice. While She caned me She asked me what She should do when She was out, and I confirm that She should have as much sexy fun as She possibly could.

The promise of seconds

After my strokes Mistress wanked my cock to make it hard. I asked if I could put it in Her but She said no – She was saving it in the hope that he would fuck Her, and She wanted to keep Her pussy nice and tight for him. She promised me seconds when She gets home tonight – or maybe even first if they don’t fuck, but nothing before.

She told me that giving me the strokes has made Her wet, and She pulled Her panties aside and invited me to feel how wet She was – and She sure was! This is the first time I am aware of that She has become sexually excited as a result of caning me.

What’s going on?

Earlier in the week, after a second day of reading constant BBM sex between the two of them, I said to Her that it really hurt me to read their sexy exchanges, and to know how much She wanted him.

She could see that I was really hurt, and She replied that the messages were ‘just crap’ with ‘no meaning’. But I humbly disagreed with Her – they are constant messages – every 2 minutes on average, all through the day, every day. And Her pussy is wet as She writes them – that’s not ‘just crap’, that’s heavy shit, combined with lunch dates and kissing in the lift.

She went quiet and thought about it, then She said:

“I am pursuing a relationship with this guy. I want him to become my boyfriend, and to fuck me well, give me great sex, not just now, but often and into the future.

For me to do that – to capture him and establish that relationship with him - there has to be an attraction, otherwise it won’t work. So what I am doing now is working to establish that attraction and relationship so that we can start fucking and then continue to do so for a long time thereafter.”

Well. That answered my question. She’s trying to win him as a boyfriend with whom She shares a mutual attraction. I guess, to do that She’s going to be kissing him, messaging him and going on dates during which She does not even think of me….That makes sense.

So now I know. It made it so much easier to accept the messaging, the kissing and the dates. She’s trying to establish him as a boyfriend – what else would I expect.

I’m happy with that now – I understand it. And I understand that with nothing but submissive sex from me, She does want and deserve a proper lover with whom She can have and enjoy alpha male sex – that’s what we’ve always wanted for Her – and She’s out now trying to get it.

The great thing is that against this background I am so much clearer and therefore accepting of what is going on. It makes it so much easier.

“Wow the lift”

Those are the words of his morning greeting on Her Crackberry today.

She told me last night that they had a ‘proper’ kiss – he put his arms round her and, my words, touched tongues. ‘Short’, She said, but ‘proper’.

No wonder he went back for seconds!

Being a man, I reckon he’ll want to go back for more today.

The Kiss...

Well… He suggested they have ‘a meeting’ in a quiet meeting room – but they decided against that…

She suggested the lift, and he thought that was a great idea, but they chickened out, and didn’t do that…so there was no kiss yesterday.

But today….they went for a lunch date, and took the lift back up to their floor – and there they had their ‘proper’ kiss.

He liked it so much, he asked for another as She left, and he joined Her in the lift again where they went up and down a few times as they snogged. Apparently they were petrified! But they did it!

Plans for Friday are getting very vague. They’ve pulled back from the hotel in the neighbouring town and are just going for a drink, with him saying ‘who knows where we will end up…’ – so who knows – apparently its all up for grabs. Very strange.

Meantime we had a very heavy discussion last night – too much to go into now – I’ll pick up on that later.

Thanks to those who answered the poll – now you know how it ended!

Catch 22

Yesterday Mistress came home at lunch time and I read the BBMs She’d been exchanging with Dave. My heart was pumping, I was excited, insecure and hurting like hell. She was telling him She would wrap Her naked legs round him and fuck him silly.

I went upstairs and told Her – I’ve just read your BBMs, and I can’t cope with it - it hurts me too much.

She sighed. ‘It’s just crap’, She said, ‘Just talk. I don’t mean it – it means nothing. It’s just crap, bloody good fun, I love it and it means nothing. It’s you I love – you know it – if I ‘m with you then I even ask you what we should say! But I don’t want to hurt you, so if it hurts you then I’ll stop. I love doing it, but I don’t want to hurt you, so I’ll stop.”

And with those words She set my mind at ease. She can do that – set my mind at ease – so easily. So I told Her I was happy for Her to carry on- now that She’d explained it, I was relaxed about it, and I still am today.

But this morning as we lay in bed, my hard on rubbing against Her thigh, She reached for my cock. “I wasn’t supposed to touch this’ She said, ‘But its mine and I’ll do what I want” and She started to wank me.

My mind wondered: Was She doing this to assuage Her guilt? To make me feel good given our conversation yesterday? To show me She wanted to engage with my cock? Because She was thinking of Dave and horny? Or actually because She wanted to?

With all those conflicting thoughts I didn’t really enjoy it as She played with my cock, and I did not cum.

This submissive cuckold thing has a pretty severe impact on my brain. She said She’s not going to touch my cock, now She is. Why?

Of course She is entitled to touch my cock if She wants. I should say She is welcome to. I should feel lucky that She does. But head fuck is head fuck, and on this matter my head is fucked, so I did not cum as She played with me this morning….

The other day Mistress said She doesn’t suck my cock (because I am Her submissive and don’t deserve it, and ) because it is too big and hurts Her jaws to do so. Dave’s is smaller and much easier to suck.

So what I am going to think next time She does suck my dick, if She does?

Be careful what you wish for…

Hey! I’ve got an update on the kissing sage – but I’m not going to share it until after the poll closes tonight. So vote now – will they kiss or not!

Will they kiss today?

In the BBM sex Mistress had with Dave yesterday evening he got very excited (“You are on your knees pointing your arse towards me, and I am putting my cock in you, fucking you deeply…”).

He ended by saying that he had thoroughly enjoyed it, and would not be able to stop himself from kissing Her in the office today – only question was where to go for a snog! Mistress suggests there is nowhere suitable and it won’t happen. But I said what about the lift? Just get in the lift together and press the button for the top floor – you’ve got the place to yourself and plenty of notice before anyone else gets in….

She liked that idea. Hardly anyone uses the lift in their building. She doesn’t think he’ll have thought of it – so question is whether She suggests it to him or not.

What do you think? Will She suggest it to him? Will they kiss? Take the poll!

Fucking Date

The date is now known. He has booked a hotel in a neighbouring town for this Friday afternoon. The two of them will leave for a late lunch, have a drink, move to the hotel room, and fuck before they leave.

The date was set up last Friday.

To prepare me Mistress has said She will not touch my cock at all until She has fucked him.

I have had to wank myself since the date was set up. And there’s still the best part of a week to go.

She is terribly excited, and looking forward to it. They’ve been having BBM sex constantly since the date was set up.

Insecurity

A couple of days ago I was easting Mistress’ pussy and it was considerably wetter than usual. After we were done I asked Her how come She was so wet, and She confessed that She had been thinking about finally getting a hotel room with Dave, and ‘ripping our clothes off and going at it as soon as we walked in the door. That really made me horny,” She said.

Needless to say it made me even more insecure. So much so that I spoke to Her about it (my insecurity) this morning.

I am in the process of launching a new business, and whereas in the past I would work all night and all day, now I like to lie with Her in bed until She wakes up, and lie with Her in the evening watching telly – just to be with Her and hold Her – to ‘protect’ ‘my’ relationship – and its affecting the hours I’m putting in to the business – and we need the income.

We discussed it in a level headed way, and we’ve yet to resolve it. But she’s just called to say She’s going for coffee with Dave this evening – so my insecurities aren’t going anywhere…

It occurred to me that while Rome was a second honey moon, and we shagged every day, Mistress never once reached for my cock and just played with it, or took it into Her mouth and sucked it. Yet when She anticipates getting it on with Dave that is exactly what She is looking forward to doing.

She was hoping he’d ask Her to a hotel this evening, but he’s not done (yet!). But if he did, She would hold his cock, play with his cock and such his cock – as well as fuck it. I only got the fucking.

I should consider myself very, very lucky. But I consider myself uncontrollably insecure.

Update…

Mistress just called. They had a pleasant coffee. They talked about when they might next meet. There is an office drinks do Friday next week – they could split away from that and ‘they could end up anywhere’ (His words – meaning in a hotel!) Then they have an office do a couple of weeks later (‘not sure I can cope with that because I won’t be able to keep my hands off you…’)

So to make it easy they’ve arranged lunch this Friday and then they’ll take it from there. I said to Her, it scary how intimate this whole thing is becoming…

Together

They are together right now. Sitting next to each other. Looking at each other, smiling. Eyeing up Her legs. Looking at his chin. Thinking of kissing, touching, of fucking. Sharing their weekend and their day. Soon, at this time, then will adjourn to fuck instead. And I’ll be sat here thinking about it.

Intimacy

What is intimacy? For four days we walked round Rome, literally, hand in hand, sat next to each other chatting laughing and kissing, and fucked all night. As Mistress says, I’m the lucky one – the one She’s with (And wants to be with) all the time.

While we are there She gets a BBM message from Dave – “Just been to see Stevie Wonder at Glastonbury. Can’t wait to see you and tell you all about it”.

“Rome is wonderful”, She says to him, “I can’t wait to tell you all about it.”

I said to Her I don’t mind if all they do is fuck, but the guys is getting too intimate with Her – why does he want to tell Her all about his week end, and hear all about Hers?

Her response: If two people are going to get together, not just to fuck, but to fuck often and for a long time, as they are planning to do, as boyfriend and girlfriend, then there has to be an attraction there, and in their case there is that attraction.

Another snippet I learned while in Rome – apparently the two of them have talked about when they were first attracted to each other. In Her case it was the very first time She saw him in the office and he gave Her an ‘I’m going to fuck you’ look. In his case it was a few months later at an office party when he decided to give it a go.

So they both know what the other does to the other.

Way too intimate. They have both agreed they want to fuck, not just a few times, but (to quote him) for a long, long time to come.

As She keeps reminding me – that’s what I always wanted for Her – a real boyfriend She could fuck well and often – to regularly give Her the alpha male sex I stopped providing some years ago.

That might be what I always wanted, but She's just called to tell me She is walking across to meet him for coffee (they walk across seperately so they are not seen leaving together - then they kiss in the coffee shop!). As the two of them leave for coffee now to catch up on each other’s weekends, I say talk was cheap. I didn’t know what I was talking about!

First day back...

This morning Mistress expressed doubt that Dave would want to continue their affair! That’s women for you! Why? Anyway, She got the idea into Her head. I assured Her this was not the case, and offered to take a bet on it – She agreed, and if he contacts her via BBM or IM in the office today, then I get to cum in Her pussy once for free – I don’t have to pay for it with strokes of the cane (see my earlier post on this).

So this morning Mistress starts to text me – conversation below. She has NEVER sent me this many texts in a morning – the only reason She’s done it is because She was worried about Her relationship with him. How does that make me feel! And why do I encourage Her?

Mistress (10:23):
Looks like you will not be winning your bet. I've been here half an hour and not a peep on IM or crackberry! I might just win this one! xx

Me (10:25):
hmmm. very strange. I sat just a matter of time. unless u break the ice... xx

Mistress (10:27):
It is v. strange. Mmmm I prob could break the ice if I hear nothing in 30mins. He's on the phone right now xx

Me (10:29):
actually, I've thought about it. I am never wrong about these things. he wants to and/or will make contact even if you don't break the ice.

Mistress (10:33):
Why do u think so? He's usually quick. So what's going on in his head? Xx

Me (10:36):
1) He MIGHT actually be busy & waiting for a quiet minute before making contact.
2) He MIGHT be a little scared coz u made contact from Rome & so wants to proceed with caution. I think option 1. xx

Mistress (10:57):
I think 2 myself. Altho, he txted me on my mobile (while we were in Rome) which in my opinion was a tad risky! xx

Me (11:00):
that's one of the reasons I think 1. plus he said he's looking fwd to sharing his stories. if u r worried then break the ice. x

Me (11:01):
if its option (2) then he is fearing that he texted u just as much as u textsd him so no need to fear.

Mistress (11:02):
I guess, he's just walked away from his desk with his crackberry and mine has just beeped whilst typing this xx

Me (11:03):
as expected then.... x

Mistress (11:03):
He's just broken the ice and has said good morning and I've said morning! How r u? See what he says xx

Me (11:05):
:)

Mistress (11:08):
He reckons he is snowed with work xx

Me (11:09):
well you know me - I never say I told u so! good. xx

Me (11:17):
if/when u smile nicely at him and tell him u hated not hearing from him, he will feel really good. X

Mistress (11:28):
As we are both very busy we've arranged a 3pm coffee for a catch up xx

Me (11:29):
That makes sense! Not! But I'm sure you'll enjoy! xx

Mistress (11:30):
I 'll be leaving, we can chat then and not bbm now and instead concentrate. Same way no more txting for you & I. Back to work xx

Me (11:31):
Xx

So that’s it – I’ve served my purpose and must now go back to focussing on my work!

When in Rome...

As I mentioned in my comment yesterday, we just got back from a great weekend in Rome. Fantastic. We highly recommend it, even though it is the most expensive place we’ve ever visited, it was great.

We toured the sites, dined al fresco twice a day, drank far too much, and fucked like rabbits – at least twice and often 3 times a day!

Having time to ourselves (we left the kids with my mum) we were really able to explore Mistress’ relationship and what it meant to both of us – we talked about it lots, happily. This made us horny as hell, and we just did it!

Mistress bought a little vibrator She liked in a sex shop there, and on that day She came like 4 times! Exhausting.

She and Dave were in touch all through the weekend, exchanging a few messages through the day, though I think She’d have liked to be in touch more.

Due to all the fucking we did, this morning Mistress announced a new rule. Whenever I cum in Her I am to make a note of it. When She next canes me I am to roll a dice for each time I came in Her, and She will give me that many additional strokes of the cane.

She says that this way I won’t make the mistake of taking Her pussy for granted. I certainly won’t.

With 7 days in a week and an average number rolled of 3 this makes 21 strokes for cumming in Her once a day, plus 15 strokes for discipline – that’s a minimum of 36 in all! Needless to say I did not try to put it in Her this morning.

Up Date

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

London II

Well, they are in London together again. They got an early train up this morning.

They are going to work until early afternoon, and then go to the pub this afternoon (well, that’s the plan). She’s not said what time She’ll be back – because it could be literally any time – depends what he throws at Her.

She told me She things he wants to fuck Her as soon as possible.

Apparently they didn’t ride up in the train together as the carriages were full – so they say apart and exchanged BB messages all the way. I wonder if he’s going to try and get Her into a hotel room this afternoon. He knows She’s up for it….

I wonder if he hinted at that in his messages earlier today…

This could be the day. I’m not sure how I’ll feel about it if he turns out to be a ‘dirty fuck’ like She hopes he will…

Coffee report

They went for coffee and discussed every day things – the latest political scandal, kids access to the internet, and other such trivia that a wife really shouldn’t be going off to meet another man to discuss. Quite discomforting really.

Of course they also discussed tomorrow’s day out… They will be in the pub from 3pm to 7pm. Last time they did that (a whole week ago!) he ended up with his fingers down Her pussy and their tongues down each other’s throats… And She’s insisted She’s wearing a dress again, not trousers. She ALWAYS wears trousers – the only reason for a skirt is so he can get easy access…

Fucking dates

They are just about to leave the office on another coffee date. She's started dressing for him every day now - She always dresses well, but now She's only choosing gear that is sexy.

Last night as we fucked She first told me She's not sure if She'll ever fuck him, then She said She's dying to fuck him, and after She has, She wants to be fucking him very often, because She thinks he's going to be 'a really dirty fuck'. Which clearly I am not.

Tomorrow they are both going to London. First to do some work, but more so that they can go to the pub together for the evening, smooch, canoodle and grope each other!

Drinks

Mistress (12:24):
Wanna meet for a drink at 1? Xx can pick me up

Me (12:25):
:) I ALWAYS wanna meet you - I'll call u when I get there. :) xx

Mistress (12:25):
Ok xx

Me (12:51):
leaving now...x

Mistress (12:51):
Ok, c u shortly xx

Me (15:02):
I hate you you mad bitch! I hope you go to the pub with Dave and others to watch the game so you have to keep your hands off him. Serve you right! Meeting me and him on the same day, you greedy woman! xx See you soon. Love you. Me xx

Mistress (15:05):
No actually not going, so there! He isn't either client coming here instead. Love you xx

Me (15:10):
good! x

Back and Forth...

Mistress (11:59):
Hey, u ok with I email I sent you? Maybe I am making it up but I detected a little upset when on the phone to you earlier? Xxx

Me (12:08):
You know me too well... :) I was still basking in your 'handsome' text, then got back to my desk to the shock of your new date, which knocked me for six. Then we spoke b4 I could recover... Even though we talk & I am happy, my jealousy kicks in & really wishes I could be all u want. But I'm dealing with it. I'm hurting but OK. xx

Mistress (12:12):
I'm sorry, it makes me feel like the worst person in the world! I must be to keep hurting you like this. I really don't know what to do here..... you are hurting too much and it's not right. It appears it doesn't matter how much we talk about it. Let's face the fact you can't hack it and live with the aftermath of ending this thing, whatever it brings . I refuse to be responsible for making you soooo unhappy coz I love you too much! Xx

Me (12:17):
Thanks Babes. I'm hurting, but I'm not exactly 'unhappy' because we have our love together. I'm happy to stick with it. But if you realy, really want to end it then I won't stop you, or cry, or hurt when you do! It's not bad that you think about ending it, but just think about ending it for now. No need to end it yet. We can stick with it. Love you. xx

Feathering the nest?

10:56am this morning I get this text from Mistress:-

Hey sexy, was looking at you this morning and the gym's working, you are looking good - I like a lot! You are my sexy , gorgeous man and I love you and I love our sex life! Wouldn't change it for a bit - it is different and exciting. I love it and you more xxxx

11:21am this morning I get this email from Mistress:-

Hi sweets

I'm going to London next Wed for an 8.30 am start so leaving fairly early so you will need to do morning school run.

Meeting a client for lunch meeting and the late afternoon meeting Dave so you will need to pick up kids. It is a Wed so similar to earlier this week so same stuff to be done in the evening as in no after school activities.

x x

Getting dirty during & after the date...

Conversation with Mistress

Mistress (17:13): (Wednesday – while away on Her date)
Hi you guys, how was school my sweeties? Hope you had a fab time. Look fwd to seeing you later xx love you xx

Me (17:37):
hello mummy. had a good day at school. love you. hope you have a good time. xxx

Mistress (19:21):
Hiya my sweeties, just got on 19:22 out of [Town] . So see you for kisses & bedtime XXXXXXX

Me (20:07):
Just got this text! U want us to pic u?

Mistress (20:14):
Thks no probs, in cab c u very soon my sweets xx

Me (10:23): (Next day in the morning)
Love you xx

Me (10:35):
let me know if you want to chat at lunch time. xx

Mistress (10:47):
love you too! I'll see how my day goes xx

Me (11:21):
Hey kid. Is Dave there? What's he saying today? :) xx

Mistress (11:29):
He wasn't here when I got here, but he has just come in from a meeting I think. However, I got a msg from him before I got here when in waitrose saying he was soo pissed he feel asleep in toilets and in the Resturant after, the boys had to come find him. He also commented saying, "what an afternoon , when can I see you again ?" that's all the communication so far xx

Me (11:31):
xx

Me (11:44):
as usual I talked shit about leaving you. I don't know how you cope with all this shit from me. you are too good. I love you and I will never leave you or give you up. I don't know why I say I will. I will never choose to stop worshipping you.

Me (11:45):
(no reply needed) x

Mistress (12:20):
Are you ok? Xx

Me (12:24):
not really. but I am managing to work at 70-80% capacity. I'd quite like a chat. xx

Me (12:45):
hi darling. that was not a very good 2 way chat. I wanted to share & agree a way forward... xx

Me (12:47):
that was not very fair, babes. a text saying "are you ok" and then half a phone call...

Mistress (12:48):
I know exactly what you want to agree! It is extremely difficult for me and I need to work out how I manage to do so. Everything I do is always for you and here I am changing things again for you. It's not fair, I don't think I deserve to be tested and treated this way. So I need to find a way to deal with it and move on with our lives exclusively for you, somehow!

Me (12:55):
"Everything I do is always for you and here I am again changing things for you" is not how it should be. Everyting you do should be for both of us. Ideally togther, but if nt, then in comon. You have a life too. And if you know exactly wht I want to agree, then you know more than I do! I am not trying to draw a line. I am trying to share my feelings. I am still happy to work together, WITH you to change my attitude FOR you (and thus for us). It's not so simple that you can close it in a text. I am sorry. xx

Me (13:00):
You are already 'blaming' me & getting cross with me. And we've not agreed a way forward. I thoughte were going to try and movforward together as friends and do the best thing for both of us. Not fall out before we've even agreed how to deal with it.

Me (13:01):
But one thing I am clear about is that I am not going to fight with you about this. I am going to be you strength, for us.

Me (13:02):
Please don't "deal with it" (= end it with Dave) until we are agreed together that it is, in balance, what we both want. xx

Me (13:18):
Looking a your text: I am not 'testing' you in any way. I don't need to test you. I know you for what you are and I absolutely love you for what you are. And if you really meant to say, as you did, that you are 'dealing with it' "exclusively" for me, then that is both sad, and, I believe, not true, beause you should be, and would be, doing it for both of us, together. Sorry we are not dealig wi this happily as I had hoped. I understand why though, and I still won't fight you. And I still want to agree a way forward together. Please don't try to spoil the love we have. xx

Mistress (13:23):
I don't want to fight nor do I want to spoil our love. I am finding this very hard tho and wondering why you want to shake us and mess what we have. Tell you something, when David first saw us, he said, we are so lucky to have each other and was in awe of the love and the bond we had. Why spoil it? Xx

Me (13:29):
I a so glad see that you don't want to figh or spoil. I don't want to shake us or mess anythig abot what we have. I am in awe of it too! Don't want to spoil the special love & bond we have. If my jealousy & suggestion we abandon cuckolding is doing so, then let's expore it together and not jump to a conclusion. I don't want to detract one bit from our love.

Me (13:34):
By the way, with your tolerance, indulgence & support, we can probably overcome my cuckold issues. I dont want to demand these from you, but we are where we are. xx

Mistress (13:35):
I really feel having got where I am now after so many many years of trying to get me here, undoing it would be ...... don't even have the words for it. We have created the person I am now, in fact the people we are now and I am loving who I am , the thingsI get to do and how it helps me love you even more. Although it is all diminished by the things I see it doing to you in contrast. Therefore, one of us is going to have to sacrifice their happiness and I will not allow it to be you becoz I believe I am the stronger of us both! It may take a while but I will get there in the end! You have proven unable to deal with me seeing someone else so you are too weak for is to decide it is you who has to give up your happiness. Like I said, I am stronger I think!

Me (13:44):
That is such a lovely message & shows why you deserve & have my love. But a few questions. Would stopping cuckolding really = "undoing" who you are? I don' think so. I don't want u to change 1 bit. Let's not sacrifice. Let's work together to continue what we have- what we both know we both enjoy: we both know I get HUGE +ves out of our cuck FemDom. Let's deal with my -ve issues +vely. The only Q is, have you got the strength to do that? If so, then let's work at it. xx

Me (13:53):
To be quite clear my issues are jealousy. I do not want you to change even one tiny bit.

Mistress (13:54):
Jealously is an ugly destructive beast!

Me (14:01):
Sure is. We did see it coming a few months ago though when you asked me if I REALLY wanted you to find someone to fuck every lunch time, and I said no, it would drive me nuts. We both chose to ignore that. Now we are dealing with it... xx

Me (14:05):
I think the jealousy would be less if you removed the once a month blow job rule, and once a year anal rule, and allowed yourself the freedom and me the dignity to enjoy more extravagant sex whenever you permitted it. But if you were getting this from DH then mine would get even less, not more, and I'd go nuts...

Mistress (14:05):
We sure are dealing with it! Shame eh! Instead of building our relationship, enjoying the pleasures & excitement .... and making our love even stronger, we are tearing it apart piece by piece, what took us many many loving years to put together!

Me (14:07):
For me, my love is not being torn apart. My love for you is 1000% stronger than ever.

Mistress (14:07):
I am happy to remove all those and allow you as much sexual freedom as you and I want. Consider them gone! It was you who wanted more sexual domination rules, which I was happy to give and equally as happy to get rid off

Me (14:09):
Good. Thank you my love. xx

Mistress (14:10):
Anything else you want? Xx
Mistress (14:11):
So stop asking me if you can do things to me..... just go ahead and do them like you did many years ago! In addition, if you want a blow job or fuck me in the arse just do it! Xx

Me (14:13):
There are no other things that I can think of. To me the biggest issue is/was accepting the loss of wild sex with the greatest sex machine god put on this earth....

Me (14:14):
But you did say you don’t want to do those things with me any more. What happened to that? xx

Mistress (14:14):
You are welcome to my blackberry! The password is lovemyhusband

Me (14:15):
You are mad! :)

Me (14:18):
If you give me that, you can't delete the history before I see it or I will go mad. You can clear it now, though, if you want, and I won't go mad, coz we had that understanding - though of course I will trust you more if you don't delete the history...xx

Mistress (14:19):
That was under a FD umbrella, me being controlling and assertive the only way I know how and I meant it! If you lead, I am sure we can still do those things! I'll do whatever makes you happy! Xx

Me (14:20):
Yes, but its not just about me, it's about you too; about us. x

Mistress (14:20):
I am not going to delete any history and wasn't even planning to do so! I have nothing to hide and never have!

Me (14:21):
I know. That's why I trust you. xx

Me (14:34):
Did I say, I love you? I do. xx

Fun date

They’re on their date now – they took a train together at 2pm to a neighbouring town where they can flirt in the pub without fear of being seen.

Mistress wore a wonderful outfit – tiny little skirt, high heals and vest. He will be delighted!

Last night I was feeling terribly jealous in anticipation, but we talked about it and as usual Mistress calmed me down.

After all my ranting and raving She simply said: “What is the point, when we are doing this because its meant to be fun? If its not fun then let’s not do it.”

That made sense, and I remembered it is meant to be fun, and gave Her my blessings to go. I fear I somewhat detracted from the anticipation and pleasure by then…

She said that tonight, before She tells me anything about the date, She will cane me to punish me for forgetting it is supposed to be fun! I can’t complain really….

Cuckold conflicts

I am driven to near obsession at the thought that I share Her with others. I don’t want to share Her – I want Her for myself.

But when I’m not sharing Her, I want to share Her.

We discussed it this morning. She says She hates the confusion – I can understand that.

She says I no longer deliver & cannot deliver the sexual gratification and excitement that She wants from a man.

Last night while we lay on the sofa I got a big hard on. I was thinking about how I might ‘do’ things to Her like strip Her, finger Her a fuck Her – things She wants to do with other men.

I showed Her my hard on and told Her I was thinking of all the things I might do to Her. She laughed and told me I would not do them, and that I should just wank it off and go to sleep. I wanked while She watched while I said ‘I don’t want to wank it off! I want you!’ But She laughed at me and I wanked, I came, and we slept.

But this morning it troubled me.

When She approaches sex with Dave She will do so from the perspective that She expects him to have alpha male sex with Her. She will strip for him, dress for him and fuck with him on that basis. If She did those things for me, then would I not also gladly enjoy alpha male sex with Her?

Granted, this was all my idea in the first place. But…

But what?

I don’t know!

She says I should be honest with myself.

Well, being honest: I don’t want to share Her. I want to be the only man with sexual access to my Goddess.

But when I am, I will want to share Her.

And what about Her being honest:-

I will never fuck Dave, She said about a month ago – She now can’t wait.

I will never fuck Chris, She said a bout a month before She fucked him.

I will never allow another man to take me away from my kids – not for any amount of time, ever, She said. Tomorrow She is going away with Dave for the evening and I am putting the kids to bed on my own.

Conflicts. Be careful what you wish for.

I’ve not decided what to do yet. But I do know one thing: I do not want to share Her. I want Her for myself. I may also want other things – but we can’t have all we want.

Date, date, date!

They went for lunch on Her last day at work before half term, and coffee today, Her first day back – and this after spending the whole week off having Blackberry Sex.

On Wednesday they are taking the afternoon off to spend the time together. Mistress has chosen the short skirt She is going to wear. She told me She want him to be able to access Her pussy when he rubs Her leg… I think they are going to fuck on Wednesday – but they might not, because it’s not the best time of the month for Her… but it’s coming very soon. She admits it now, that She’s looking forward to it – based on his BBM sex talk, She’s hoping he’ll be a good fuck.

She’s worried – get this – that he won’t like Her pussy because it is shaven bald, and he has previously said he likes a small railtrack! Oh please! Of course he’ll like it!

On Sunday Mistress gave me 15 strokes for discipline, plus 10 more for asking her if She’d checked her Crackberry when She went to the ladies loo when we were out at the pub. At first She denied She had, but later She admitted She had, and said She would punish me for asking. I am to assume, She said, that they are always having Blackberry sex, and She is always checking Her messages from him – so there is no need for me to ask or guess – because they are.

Exclusivity

Yesterday Mistress said that She doesn’t want macho sex stuff from me – not words nor deeds. If She wants to talk dirty then She’ll do it with Dave, and when She wants dirty sex, She’ll have that with him too – so She doesn’t want that from me – She wants complete control over our sex life, and for me to do as I am told by Her – including never talking to Her about nor asking for macho sex.

I thanked Her for Her guidance in this matter.

Later I asked Her: What if I decided that actually I’d like sexual exclusivity with Her – to be the only sexual provider in Her life.

She replied that if that was what I decided then She would respect my decision, because She is happily married to me.

Later still I suggested to Her that if She wanted and had ‘complete control’ in our relationship, then surely, it should actually be down to Her if I got exclusivity or not. She agreed with this, and said I could forget it.

But deep down, we both know that if I pulled the plug on it She wouldn’t see anyone else (not that She’d admit to me anyway!)

So why don’t I?

For years I’ve never been jealous of Her with other men – the one thing that changed it was Her telling me what great sex She had with David. So now She’s enjoying it I should pull the plug? Hardly seems fair. But life’s not fair.

Anyway, I won’t pull the plug. But it hurts like fuck some times.

Too busy

She's 'too busy' to text me when She's at work.

I wonder how many messages She's exchanged with Dave this afternoon...

"Interesting" lunch

Mistress told me this morning that one of Dave's messages to Her said:-

"I am sitting behind you, holding your legs wide appart. I push my finger deep into you, and feel how wet you are".

She was wondering how he'd behave towards Her at lunch - the first private appointment they've had since the explicit BBM sex.

Half Term

Mistress was off for half term – we’ve had a great time together and with the kids.

On the last day of the previous week that they were both in the office they went for lunch together ‘because they wouldn’t see each other over the week She was off’.

Today is Her first day back, and they’ve gone for lunch together to celebrate Her return.

Last night Mistress gave me the disciplinary caning She was not able to give me on Sunday because we were out, and then made me wank into the cup in front of Her while repeating that “I am the village idiot”. I then drank my cum and joined her in bed.

More text....

(Me): I read this passage over the weekend. Made me fear what life with you would be like if you were like this:-

Miss Strang then fetched a book from the shelf.

"Place your hands closer together, John. No, keep the palms face upward, please, as I asked you to do."

She then placed the book across John's outstretched palms. It covered them completely. I felt a little flutter of breathlessness as she did this. It seemed an odd thing to do, and rather disturbing.

"John, you ought to be able to exercise self-control. I expect you to stay over the arm of the chair, without struggling and without resisting. I have placed the book on your hands as an encouragement to you to keep in position. If at any time you take your hands from under the book or disturb it in any way, then you will receive two extra strokes. Do you understand?"

Text

Me (14:42): God my cock is so hard. Xx

Mistress (14:48): Oh why, what u thinking abt? Xx

Me (14:50): Do you REALLY want to know my terrible, disgusting, humiliating thoughts? X

Mistress (15:49): yes xx

Me (16:07): I was having submissive thoughts I am ashamed of. Fantasising that you decided to use the cane more to train me to be the way you want, including, perhaps, punishing me for not dealing with your BBM very well, and training me to only ever talk about it by way of offering you your phone if I notice a message has come in. Perhaps training me to not mention Dave's name unless you do first. And always using the cane ruthlessly to enforce your will. I am ashamed to say my cock is hard again thinking about it. :-( I imagine you train me to the point where I proactively submit to you so much that I point out to you that I was unable to offer myself for strokes last Sunday and offer myself the next day, because if I don't offer myself then you will punish me for not doing so. Like I said, I am ashamed of my submissive fantasies. Love you. xx

Mistress (16:10): No need to be ashamed. I like your thoughts. In fact thought similar ones re Sunday caning and abt Dave & BBM xx

Jealousy

We had a great bank holiday weekend.

Mistress was often on Her Crackberry exchanging messages with Dave.

At one point I said to Her, carefully and without angering Her, that I was jealous. That any time She spent on him was time not spent on me. I explained that just because I didn’t complain when She did it, I didn’t Her to be under any illusion that it caused me great jealousy and humiliation.

She accepted that She did feel guilty when doing it, too. But She still did it.

This morning, when She was out at the gym, I got a texted kiss from Her at 11:29.

I read it and thought Dave must be exchanging messages with Her, so She’s decided to make me happy by texting me too. So I texted back a big smile and some kisses.

That is jealousy. She texts me, and instead of me being grateful and happy She has chosen to do it, I conclude that She only did it to assuage Her feeling of guilt at Her ongoing conversation with him.

She called on Her way home for lunch and I started food preparations. I took the rubbish out to the bin, and found Her sat in Her car in the garage on Her Crackberry – obviously messaging him….

When She came in I asked why She’d felt the need to sit in Her car and do it – why not come in, sit down and do it?

She said that it was because She had started the message at the club, and was only finishing it off. Hmmm. I don’t get that, but there we go.

She put Her Crackberry down and then fought with Herself not to look at it again in front of me (my jealousy speaking again!). Eventually I took it to Her and told Her to feel free to check it whenever She wanted.

She grunted and did so.

Then She went up to shower, and left Her BB in Her handbag. I saw the light flashing – new message in, and took it upstairs and put it next to Her tea…..

“It’s just a fuck”

When Mistress was seeing David and I was getting stressed, She used to say ‘It’s just a fuck’.

Interesting idea. Of course most wouldn’t agree – ‘just a fuck’ usually = ‘just a divorce’!

But let’s explore the idea.

Mistress has kinky sex text with Dave. As a result She gets turned on, I get turned on, and we fuck more.

When She fucks me, is She thinking of him? I don’t know (although as I pounded into Her last night I suggested this, and She grunted enthusiastically!).

And what about Dave? His wife must be getting a right banging – and She has no idea why. Dave wants to fuck my Wife, but instead, he takes it out on his wife.

If his wife found the BBM sex she’d go ballistic. But I’m sure she enjoys the extra sexual attention she’s getting.

She hasn’t fucked Dave yet. She said She’s not sure if She will – She recognises the chase is probably more fun than the act. She says that when She looks him in the eye She can’t see Herself fuckign him. I reckon that’s bollocks, and She’d love to fuck him.

What if he turns out to be a disappointment? The bubble will burst and the fun of the BBM sex and flirtation will be lost.

What if he turns out to be a love machine like David was? Then She’ll have to say ‘its just a fuck’ as She goes back for more.

Oopsy!

Hmm. Silly me. And the silly green-eyed monster.

Turns out Her office spam filters blocked the email, so She never got it. And She’s not looked at the BB at all until now…. So She didn’t even know I was trying to get hold of Her.

I have eaten Humble Pie.

Sex isn't enough.

Mistress just called - at 2:07 - 2 Hours 23 minutes after I first contacted Her.

She knew She'd done me wrong, because She asked: 'Are you OK?' Of course I'm OK. The only reason not to be OK is if I'm pissed that She's ignoring me. So I sent this in reply.

I suspect She won't see the message - because I sent it to Her iPhone - and She's only interested in Her Blackberry these days.

If She calls to talk (and I think She night not, actually) then I'm not sure I'll answer Her call.

It's just sex

Yesterday Mistress got home (after her day with the lunch date) and hit the Blackberry all the time – non-stop until about 9pm. Read, smile, text, chuckly, text, and so it went on.

She never did let me see it.

When we put the kids to bed, and I was alone with it in the room, I checked quickly to see if She’d changed the password. She hadn’t. I read.

“Oh god. I’m cumming, my cum is all over your dick.”

“Gosh yes, that feels good.”

Etc. I could read it for long. But it was explicit BBM sex.

Just before I picked it up, he’d sent a text She hadn’t read:-

“I’m playing” it said. Because I didn’t have long, I could get to see the context, but I think he meant he was wanking.

When She got down, She spotted that I must have opened the BB up – because this message She’d not read was not showing as unread.

She asked if I’d read it and I said yes. I said She’d not changed the password, so I’d read some of it.

She changed the password there and then. End of that.

Later at night in the sitting room I asked if I could play with my cock while I told Her how humiliating and pathetic I felt about Her having text-sex with him, not me.

She got me to play with Her pussy. OMG! It – was – soaking! I have never felt it that wet in my life!

She said it was because of the phone sex, and that may be true. But I think he may have fucked Her over lunch, because it was soaking.

She wanted me to go down on Her, and I did, eating Her to orgasm. Then She had me fuck Her – in the sitting room again. As I fucked her She told me the disgusting things they had texted about – I can’t even remember them – they were mind blowing, and I came deep in Her.

This is the second day running we’ve fucked in the sitting room. We haven’t done that once inside the last two years. And, as She said, this is the first time I’ve cum in Her 3 times in 24 hours in longer than either of us can remember.

We went up to bed.

This morning when She came down for breakfast, first stop was the Crackberry. ‘Oh!” She said happily, big smile, “8:30 in the morning and I’ve got a ‘Good Morning’” She took time out to send a reply, and Her day started.

11:45 this morning I sent Her an email – to Her office. No reply. I called the office, She didn’t pick up. I called Her mobile, She didn’t pick up. I texted Her Blackberry, She didn’t reply.

At 1:45 I was getting worried, I called Her mobile. It went to answerphone. I called Her Blackberry, She picked up. At last. We spoke.

How many text messages do you think She exchanged with him between 11:45 and 1:45 while I couldn’t get hold of Her? I wonder.

But now She’s changed the password, I’ll never know.

Lunch time chat...

Blood all over the floor

It was madness in here last night.

After She got home She went upstairs to change. 19 minutes later I noticed Her BB was gone, and I went upstairs, to see if She was using it. As I went up the stairs I glimpsed Her in one of the kids rooms, texting him. She hadn’t changed.

In the hope that I hadn’t seen and wouldn’t notice, She dropped the BB onto a chair in the kids room, rather than walk out holding it.

I concluded that She’d actually gone up to get away from me and text him in private.

I challenged Her on this (very politely) – why try to hide it from me?

Of course She didn’t like that – She “dropped the BB where She did so that I would pick it up” (!!) “Why was I mistrusting Her?” She was “going to tell me all about what they had said that day” Etc etc etc. It got quite ugly for quite a long time. There were distinct throwbacks to the difficult times of David at his peak…

At 2am I put Her hand on my cock and asked Her to hold it. I apologised for challenging Her, and I suggested to Her that we introduce the understanding that Her relationship with him (or anyone else) was solely for Her pleasure and not for mine. That She would change the unlock codes on Her iPhone and BB so that I could not unlock them, and that I would be forbidden from asking for the codes or for any details as to what traspired between Her and any of Her men, ever.

She agreed, and we fucked to consummate the agreement.

In the morning I woke up hard again and fucked Her again, as I asked Her what had transpired the day before that She ‘was going to tell me about’.

She told me I had no right to ask, and that She would think about it and may punish me tonight for asking.

In the meantime, while I thrust into Her She told me that he is off tomorrow, and so today is actually the deadline for his challenge to pull Her close to him and give Her a kiss – a challenge he said he would fulfil today.

She’s left for work looking absolutely stunning. She’s just texted to say She’s off for lunch with him. She’s not mentioned the challenge or any conversations they’ve had today, and when She comes home I won’t be able to ask.

So I didn’t have the guts to shut up. But I’ve got my secret wish – There is no longer any expectation that She will share with me, and I am forbidden from asking – Her pleasure is Hers alone except to the extent, if any, that She chooses to share it with me.

This should give me peace at last.

We haven't fucked twice in one night since I was a lad!

The guts to shut up

Mistress just called me on Her way to school to pick the kids. We had a chat. She’s looking forward to reading Her book in the school car park while She waits for the kids to come out.

We didn’t talk about Dave. I didn’t mention him, and neither did She.

I wish I was forbidden to raise him as a topic. It would be much easier for me.

As it is, I am free to ask if I want – but I don’t want to burden Her with my worries, to detract from Her enjoyment.

And then if I don’t ask, She thinks I don’t want to know. But of course I do. I want to know everything.

It’s a no win situation.

If She did ban me from asking, and then never told me, I’d never know anything.

But I’m going to try it – I’m going to not ask about him in future.

Mind matters

I just texted Her: ‘Is Her boyfriend in the office enjoying Her company?’ (he goes out to work quite a bit).

“as always xxx” She texted back.

It occurs to me, this guy actually spends more time in communication with Her than I do. They spend the whole working day in the office together flirting on IM (when they are not out having coffee or lunch).

She used to tell me what he’d said in the day – how much he’s loved Her dress, or how nice Her new haircut was. But not any more.

Much of the time I spend with Her we are in bed asleep.

OK. I agree. I’m the lucky one – I get to sleep naked with Her every day, and have sex with Her every other day or so. But he’s still pretty lucky too. He has Her mind more than I do.

Deadline Friday

Mistress told me that when She met with Dave yesterday he said he must organise an opportunity to pull Her close to him and hold Her tight (an expression they had used while having BBM sex – which, apparently, he also said he wants more of).

She said that was fine, and She’d like that. But, She said, She’s off for a week from close of business Friday, so She suggested he better make the time before then…

BBM Sex Day

Last Thursday – the BBM (Blackberry Messenger) sex day Dave and Mistress started texting each other at 10:30 in the morning, and they exchanged text message every 1 to 20 minutes through the day until 7:30pm.

I texted Her at 12 noon and again at 1pm and didn’t get a reply until 1:30. She was too busy having BBM sex with Her boyfriend to notice my text.

When I pointed this out to Her She denied it, said I was talking nonsense, She was just too busy to look at Her ‘phone all the time.

But the facts speak for themselves.

His cock was “this” big

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

Secret fantasies

I wonder if or when She will start to meet him for coffee in secret. She’s never done so so far, and I’m not sure She ever will.

She mentioned today’s coffee date on Thursday, and has not mentioned it since. I’m sure She knows I’ve not forgotten – but She’s not reminded me. She didn’t call on Her way there, and has not called (yet) to say its over and She’s on Her way to school.

I don’t think She’ll ever have a secret coffee. But She could, and I’d never know.

In my fantasies, She has many secrets:-

Secret coffee – She stops telling me about Her coffee dates – after the event She might mention it: “Last week when I was having coffee with Dave….”

She forbids me, on penalty of punishment, from asking about coffee dates. Or any dates for that matter.

Secret text messages – She changes Her passwords on Her Crackberry and Her iPhone so I can’t get in to them. She forbids me from ever asking who She is texting, or talking about texting him.

She mentions it if She wants: puts Her phone down and chuckles: “That guy is mad” She says. That’s it.

Secret sex – She starts screwing him, and never mentions it to me unless She wants to. 5pm text: ‘I’m going to meet Dave. Back home late. Food in fridge for you’. Or She just tells me to go down on Her in bed, and I notice that Her pussy is full of cum.

She forbids me from talking to Her about sex with him, or anyone else.

Of course there is one secret: That's I've not shared these secret fantasies with Her.

Smokin’ Blackberry

Last week Mistress and Dave appeared to have taken most of the day off – to text each other on their Blackberries.

As She said when She finally let me see Hers, they were having BBM sex, and boy, were they just!

“I undo the zip of your trousers and your cock jumps out. I wrap my fist around it.”

“I push your dress up and put my finger in you. You are so wet. I go down and kiss you there. I can’t resist it”

That sort of thing.

She was horny as fuck when She got home – I was the beneficiary of that!

They’ve been at it ever since.

And now they’ve gone for coffee (again). Their first private face to face time since the BBM sex.

Interesting to see what transpires.

Yesterday She cleared Her BBM history, so I was unable to see what they were chatting about. I don’t know if She did this so I couldn’t see, or just as routine housekeeping. I’ll never know.

Infidelity

We were at a house party recently when another mum tells Mistress that an old school friend is hitting on her via Facebook, and she’s loving it. She wanted Mistress to get the hostess’ lap top from her, so that she could go and Skype with this guy in a spare room during the party!

“I love my kids. I love my husband. The sex with him is great. But I just can’t help myself. I want more. Am I bad?” She said to Mistress.

Well, Mistress knows all about the delights of the chase and excitement of extra-marital sex, so She was not the best person to ask this question.

I don’t know the woman in question, or her husband. But it’s a true story. Happened only 3 weeks ago.

Plain sailing

Apparently the coffee was quite uneventful. They chatted about work and stuff, and only flirted briefly, to agree that they must ‘set up’ the private time/date at which he can give Her Her kiss.

Last night he travelled away on business. The two of them texted into the night as he sat alone on the train he was on. A bit of flirting, a bit of talk.

Although She denies it, Mistress is definitely pushing his boundaries fairly hard. She does not want their relationship to stagnate into a platonic one. Though She claims She does not want to fuck him either.

I think She’s getting used to him, starting to like him more, and has actually decided She wants to fuck him, but just struggled admitting that to me or Herself.

Anyway, he’s away for the rest of this week, so its plain sailing time for me – at least I know She’s not spending the day meeting him for coffee and lunch dates!

Coffee time...

She's good to me.
She called as She walked across to meet him at the coffee shop. They've not got long, as he's got to be back to a meeting in 10 minutes.

Apparently he's out the office the rest of the week, so he didn't want to miss out on this opportunity (to press home his current advantage - my words those!).

My Text Release

I couldn't help myself. I had to ask. But I did it subtly! I got away with it - we're both happy.

When is a secret not a secret?

Mistress had Her hair cut very short this weekend.

Last night, She let drop that within minutes of walking into the office, Dave IM’d Her to say how much he liked the new hair cut.

She didn’t tell me this during the day. Or in the evening when we first chatted, but fairly late at night, after some time.

I appreciate Her saying this is not the most significant event of the day (I’m sure the Red Shirts in Thailand would agree with that!) But to me it is significant.

And now.

Have they been for their coffee yet?
If so, did he kiss Her? Put his arms around Her? Hold Her?
If they’ve not been for coffee yet, then why? And has he flirted with Her? Continued the overt banter started yesterday?

Perhaps they’ve been for coffee. Had the kiss and the light touch. Discussed when they might get together. They might have made that date She was trying to line up for Friday afternoon drinks.

When will I know that which She chooses to tell me? Seems wrong to ask. I feel I should wait.

I think its starting to happen

When I got in from the gym last night Mistress was sat in the family room texting furiously on Her Crackberry. ‘Dave’. I figured, and waited to see if She’d offer it to me to read. She didn’t. At least not for a while anyway.

Every 30-40 seconds they’d exchange another message, and so it went on.

Eventually She gave me the Crackberry to have a read of their conversation, which had been going on since 11am.

She smiled as She informed me She’d managed to draw him out of his shell into some direct flirting, when he was stone cold sober. She obviously saw this as progress.

Sure enough they were texting away about good and bad boys, good and bad girls, and kissing and cuddling each other.

I can’t see the guy going back from here. The door is wide open now, and he can only build on it.

They are having a coffee date this morning, so it’ll be interesting to see how he builds on their conversation from yesterday. The overt sexual nature of their relationship is out now, and he can more openly pursue the stated objective of his texts last night – to get Her on Her own where he can get his hands and mouth all over Her (I think that’s the polite way of saying shag Her!).

Fucked to death

In bed Mistress was kinky and spread Her legs for me to finger Her. As I did She made me confess all my most sordid Femdom fantasies. She let me put it in Her before going down on Her, and then fucked me until I came, before telling me to go down and eat Her to glorious orgasm.

Gosh there was a lot of groaning in our bed last night. My cock has still not recovered. Wonderful.

She left this morning with new high heeled shoes and a tiny little skirt. He’s going to enjoy his coffee date…

Unusually dominant

Yesterday we took the kids to London to see the Houses of Parliament, Number 10 and Buckingham palace. The recent change in government had provoked a bit of a civics lesson that we all enjoyed.

So it was late before Mistress and I finally got up to bed - 12:45 am.

I asked, because I am required to, if Mistress wanted me to present myself for strokes. To my surprise She answered Yes. I’d thought that due to the late hour She might choose not to.

I presented myself, bound on our bed as usual.

She gave me 15 disciplinary strokes, as usual, and then gave me 5 more, harder ones, as punishment for criticising Her earlier in the day.

I thanked Her and we slept.

As my cock hardened into Her arse under the sheets She felt round to my arse, rubbing the stripes She had laid on it. “Hmm!” She said “I can feel the stripes! Nice!” She’s never done or said anything like that before.

She commented on my hard-on that was pressing into her back, and told me that next time I was naughty She would forbid me from touching Her. She told me to get out of bed, get up and wank into a pot, and drink my own cum.

I got out of bed and went to get a container from our dressing room. She told me to stand in the light in there facing Her, and wank where She could see me.

‘Play with yourself. Wank your cock, like the village idiot that you are!” She instructed me from under the covers as She watched.

As I wanked for Her She made me say humiliating things like ‘I always play with my cock because I am the village idiot’ and apologise for criticising Her earlier and the like. I humbly did as instructed.

Eventually I came in the pot and drank it, but She told me to lick it clean inside, so I stuck my finger into the pot and scrapped up all the cum, licking it off my finger before washing it, putting it away and getting into bed.

This is unheard of behaviour for Her. I can’t figure it.

She has never:-

i) delighted in the cuts She placed on my arse before,

ii) made me wank in front of Her quite like that,

iii) humiliated me making me say humiliating things, and

iv) threatened to withdraw access to Her body.

Of course I was in submissive heaven. Anything She wants because She enjoys, I want too.

But I do wander what change this marks. If any. Very odd. I’ll keep you posted here.

Lucky me!

Mistress has had a hard day and fancies a drink of wine!

Lucky me! I get to go to the pub with Her!

So long.

My ears are burning

As I sit here working, my ears are burning with humiliation. The two of them are out together, having fun, enjoying a glass of wine and goodness knows whatever else, and I’m stuck at my desk.

Mistress and I discussed the Tuesday coffee on Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday, and it wasn’t until Thursday that she ‘mentioned’ that he’d put his hand round Her waist and kissed Her on the cheek.

All I will ever know is what She chooses to tell me.

I wish I was the jock stud, wining and dining some gorgeous bimbo and putting my arms round Her, but I don’t want any other bimbo. I want Her.

What are they saying? What are they doing?

They’ve probably been in the restaurant for an hour and a half by now. Chatting, smiling, flirting, talking.

What are they saying? What are they thinking and doing?

Which bits will She choose to share with me?